NEVER LET A STRANGE MAN USE YOUR BATHROOMLike Arthur Miller, I leapfrog quite a bit. Not only do I have a stack of unfinished ideas, but I have ideas with no true home; little snippets of dialogue that I have yet to find a story to fully utilize them. Here are a few for your disjointed reading enjoyment:
No setup needed.MAN#1: Suddenly, my life has become a bad After School Special.
MAN#2: I don't recall any After School Specials involving dead hookers.
Explaining recent break-up.MAN#1: She really liked Steve Miller.
MAN#2: What's wrong with that? Look at 'The Joker'. Great f-ing song.
MAN#1: No, she really likes Steve Miller. She wants to spend the summer following them cross-country.
MAN#2: Are they even touring?
MAN#1: I have no idea.
Food Shopping.WOMAN: According to your list, you need chips, paper towels and bear.
MAN: I meant beer.
WOMAN: But it clearly says B-E-A-R.
MAN: I must have been suffering from alcohol withdrawal. I need beer.
(beat)
MAN: I wonder what bear tastes like though. Think we can pick some up?
Self-explanatory.MAN#1: How was your date?
MAN#2: All right, I guess.
MAN#1: Get lucky?
MAN#2: No, but I did beat off into her facial scrub.
MAN#1: So, in essence, you gave her a facial.
MAN#2: Sounds like a pretty good date to me.
"I don't care who you are, that's funny. Gator done"
wojr
Labels: Intoxication, My Writing, Whores