ANOTHER BAD DAY?Things could be worse:

Your anus could start whistling the song from "The Bridge Over The River Kwai." Without ever stopping.

Instead of getting a raise, the state garnishes your wages.

Your significant other could ask you to go on "Springer" because of a secret that begs to be revealed.

Beer could be sold only in ziploc bags.

Not only could both men and women menstruate, but they could do it via their tearducts.

There could be pictures of you torturing Iraqi prisoners of war.

There could be pictures of you with a bullwhip up your bottom.

All your favorite television shows could be off the air or moved back to 2005. (That one hurts me. Worse than the bullwhip.)

Your boss could change your Job Title to "Ass Pirate".

You could be like me and your girlfriend could get free front row concert tickets. To Dido. Tonight.
Fucking Dido.
HAPPY HAPPY HUMP DAY.
wojr
Labels: Advice, My Writing, Snide Remarks