You See! I Too Can BE In a Minority (aka More Porn Talk)

Being the utterly dull white hetero male that I am, I jump at any chance to be lumped in with a minority, especially the ones that don’t involve burning crosses.

In this entry to her “word blog”, Rachael Noel comments on the minority I wholeheartedly belong to:

I've had this conversation with my roommate a number of times. He is of the male minority it seems, in that he does not get off on the experience of watching two women go at it. His rationale is that a in a lesbian scene, there is no way for him to mentally project himself into what he's watching - no direct influence nor interest on the part of his own male libido.

Without a penis in the scene, it’s hard for me to identify with the needs of any of the characters. I require someone/thing to root for (I was about to write "someone to get behind" but I caught myself).

This rationale does not mean that just having a cock in a porno flick automatically makes one "the protagonist" in my eyes. I’m not that sexist. Women can be the central characters of porn films as well. (Well, unless it’s a guy with a really HUGE schlong, then that dude has got to be hero.)

In addition, with lesbian scenes, the cynic in me never allows me to believe that I am seeing actual female orgasms. Even the ones that claim to have projectile orgasms generate doubt in my mind. (No, Phillyboom, I still have full faith in your "Squirt" story.)

Speaking of orgasms - in her blog, Noel goes on to comment on a website, www.beautifulagony.com (Link is quasi-NSFW), that “resonates” with her sexual interests. The site contains videos of men and women reaching sexual fulfillment – framed from their shoulders on upward.

That site reminds how I once told Bronc that I wanted to make a clip montage of the horrible “O” faces from old school pornos. You know the ones that were obviously shot ten minutes after the actual climax. (Come on, if the scene is being shot with only one camera, how did they get the shot of his face as well as the money shot? Suspension of belief, my ass.) Beautiful Agony's faces appear infinitely more sincere and believe than those pornos of my youth.

And on one last porn-related side note, another item found on Fleshbot.com (Link is NSFW) states:

It’s not that the movie looked bad or that the all-female cast couldn’t melt stone with one leg wrapped around their collective back; it was just a marketing decision: Alpha 15, Big Sister And the Trial of Emily LaBore just didn’t sound like a porn title. It had to be changed to something conducive to making high-end adult consumers want to rent it as a precursor to making sweet consensual love.

Personally, I think Alpha 15, Big Sister And the Trial of Emily LaBore is an utterly fantastic title. Reminds me of Stephen Colbert’s Stephen Colbert’s Alpha Squad 7: Lady Nocturne: A Tek Jansen Adventure. (A book which makes me hard just thinking about it.)

But who am I kidding? Alpha 15 has an all-female cast. It plays to the majority and leaves my sorry minority ass at the back of the bus -- feeling all limp and flaccid.

wojr  ¶ 5:23 PM