wojr - words, occasionally sentences

wojr - words, occasionally sentences

Thursday, April 13, 2006

I Would Never Forgive You If You Faked My Death

Found this story on KCCI.com (via attu (NSFW):

Police in Iowa have arrested two people accused of filing a fake obituary for teenager Dan "D.J." Reddout with a newspaper to get off work for a few days.

Police said James Ralph Snyder, who is the boyfriend of Reddout's mother, and the boy's mother, Mary Jo Elizabeth Jensen, submitted a death notice to the Waterloo-Cedar Falls Courier newspaper, saying that Jensen's 17-year-old son had died at the Mayo Clinic after a lengthy illness.

Authorities were notified after the teen was spotted at a restaurant by some family friends.

Police said the pair did it so they could get off work for a few days.

Both Snyder and Jensen worked at Tyson Foods and started taking time off from work in December by claiming the boy was hospitalized with an illness, the paper reported.

As the scheme continued, Tyson officials were told the boy was on life support and had died, according to the paper.

And here is a link to the actual obit.

First off, is this really a crime? I could understand if they lied to a government agency or under some type of oath, but these criminal masterminds lied to a newspaper. If that’s a crime, Bush & Cheney should be cited every day.

The funny thing, though, is that KCCI.com is running a survey along with the story.

“Would you be able to forgive your parents if they faked your illness and death for personal gain?”

So, far “No, I would never forgive them” is the front runner.

If my dad faked my death for personal gain, I’d be proud of him. If he got some tail out of the deal, I’d be doubly so. (Ladies, Papa Woj is a handsome single man that owns his own house and speaks four languages. If interested, email me for a dating application.)

How could you never forgive your parents for just being stupid and lazy? As long as they feed you, clothe you and refrain from sticking things in your ass, they should get a free pass on the fake obit.

But I’m biased, I hate Tyson Foods.

wojr

¶ 12:04 PM

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