Just So We Can Claim to Have an Indian Affairs Correspondent

As a follow up to this wojr.com post, our Senior Indian Affairs Correspondent, the Lord of Truth, has forwarded us this story from abc.com:

Sanju Bhagat's stomach was once so swollen he looked nine months pregnant and could barely breathe.

Living in the city of Nagpur, India, Bhagat said he'd felt self-conscious his whole life about his big belly. But one night in June 1999, his problem erupted into something much larger than cosmetic worry.

An ambulance rushed the 36-year-old farmer to the hospital. Doctors thought he might have a giant tumor, so they decided to operate and remove the source of the bulge in his belly.

One doctor recalled that day in the operating room. "He just put his hand inside and he said there are a lot of bones inside," she said. "First, one limb came out, then another limb came out. Then some part of genitalia, then some part of hair, some limbs, jaws, limbs, hair."

At first glance, it may look as if Bhagat had given birth. Actually, Mehta had removed the mutated body of Bhagat's twin brother from his stomach. Bhagat, they discovered, had one of the world's most bizarre medical conditions — fetus in fetu. It is an extremely rare abnormality that occurs when a fetus gets trapped inside its twin. The trapped fetus can survive as a parasite even past birth by forming an umbilical cordlike structure that leaches its twin's blood supply until it grows so large that it starts to harm the host, at which point doctors usually intervene.

Was it really necessary to point out the appearance of the genitalia? Wasn’t the litany of limbs, hair and limbs enough? Plus, how many limbs did that twin have? I lost count at six.

And what the hell is going on in India? First, a guy with two dicks and now one with eight limbed mutant freaks in their stomach?

Where are the good old days when all you needed was a hunchback or a nice sized goiter to freak people out?

And what happened to hunchbacks, anyhow? They’ve become harder to find than your run of the mill mad scientist. I miss me a good mad scientist.

Of course, I haven’t been looking for them in India, churning out mutant freaks that take the jobs of good ol’ American freaks.

Next up from our Senior Indian Affairs Correspondent, the Lord of Truth: an in-depth analysis of General Custer’s Battle at the Little Bighorn.

wojr

Labels: News

  ¶ 12:52 PM