Wojr is Actually Spanish for Fighting Chicken

For those that do not know, the Urban Dictionary is a netdemocratic guide to street slang. I can not lay claim to the word ‘netdemocratic’, I stole that. I stumbled upon the netdemocratic site when my white ass needed to know what the hell S’KEET was – thanks entirely to Dave Chappelle’s black ass.

While there, I, given my heightened level of self-involvement, found the following:

According to the Urban Dictionary, ‘woj’ can mean:

1. A legendary gaming community
2. Ass, Arsehole, Ring, Bum hole.
3. a really tall dildo man

I knew about these definitions for a while now but personally, I can't see woj meaning those things. I know that I’m an ass. It is true, but that has nothing to do with my name or nickname. Also, I have no idea what “a really tall dildo man” is. How tall is really tall anyway?

Push comes to shove however, I would imagine woj meaning the same thing as s’keet. And yes, s’keet means to ejaculate.

Think about it. If you uttered the following sentence, "I wojed on her face" - the first bodily fluid that would come to your mind would be semen. Even if you had a vagina.

While I like the idea of my name having ties to ejaculation, I was going to let the whole thing go until I read the following on valleywag.com:

Don't ask us how we got it, or how many honkeys and limeys we had to kill for it, but after the jump [ON THEIR SITE NOT HERE] is Verizon Wireless's list of [EIGHTY-THREE] inadmissable naughty words. Verizon content providers (including many online news and entertainment sources) are banned from using obvious words like "fuck" and its derivatives, a smattering of racial slurs, and "queer" and "lesbo" -- always a perfect way to pick a fight with more audacious gay rights activists. Ahh, the freedom of communication under New Media.

As one can imagine, I’m not a fan of censorship on any level. I FUCKING HATE CENSORSHIP. Hell, I might dress up like Mohammed for Halloween just to show my support of the first amendment. I just need to find a good picture of him to see what the guy looks like. Right now, I expect him to look a lot like Raj.

Back to the point, I’m pissed off at Verizon Wireless over their policies and I’m not even trying to be one of their content providers. But their list has some comedy gems. Like--

Who gave them the right to say that ‘fleshpopsicle’ is a naughty word? Have they every seen the smile on a child’s face when you offer them a nice fleshpopsicle on a hot summer day? I think not.

What the hell is a ‘rubyredbag’ and why should that word be banned? Sounds like something out of Hobbit porn. “And then Sam licked the folds of Frodo’s rubyredbag.”

And really, ‘fornicate’ and ‘sodomize’ are on somebody’s watch list but ‘woj’ isn’t?? Woj could be a really tall dildo man and you already have ‘dildo’ on your watch list, Verizon. Come on people, let’s get in the game.

Speaking of game, I even checked the NFL’s list of 1,159 words you can’t put on the holiest of holies, a NFL jersey. Woj and Wojr are both ok, but I think that list is suspect since there is no mention of Ron Mexico and the page has lots of ads for homosexual websites.

Although, I do wonder why 'AXING THE WEASEL' was a no go with my NFL peeps.

Now, one might ask why if I am so against censorship would I want my name to be censored?

Well, I see the censorship of the words ‘woj’ or ‘wojr’ as just an initial step to utter reverence for those same names. You know, like Yahweh. Getting yourself on the same level as of a god of consuming fire takes time, I know. But I’m willing to work at it, put in the extra hours, roll up my sleeves and make it happen.

But I’m getting ahead of myself. Anyhow--

To Summarize the Main Idea of this Post: I’m Trying to Get My Name To Equal Splooge in the Minds of America

Is that too much to ask for?

wojr

Labels: Crackers, Snide Remarks, woj

  ¶ 10:31 AM